Lately I have seen a considerable shift in the movement towards empowering women. I for one, think that is amazing. I believe every woman has the right to feel confident, successful and well…empowered (for a better lack of the word). For me, that is nothing new. I have always stood up for what I believe in, gone after my dreams, and shown an unrelenting desire to succeed. I realise this is hasn’t been the case for a lot of women around the world. But in relation to the culture I observe in Australia, there seems to be an unhealthy approach to women having to ‘have it all.’
Not too long ago women didn’t work so they could bring up children. Slowly we saw a shift toward women forging their way into the corporate world, developing their own businesses and standing up for what they believed in. I felt we started to get to a really empowering stage. And now I fear it has gone too far in the other direction. I see women struggling to maintain a career, have children, be a good wife, cook and clean, have a side hustle, exercise (no, be an athlete), dress well, be a good daughter/sister/aunty/cousin/granddaughter/niece/whatever, maintain friendships and social outings and drink green juices whilst meditating! And if you don’t do all that, who are yo? And are you even a woman? How have we gone from doing a few things well to merely ticking boxes?
I know the usual culprits such as mainstream media and social media have weighed down heavily on this, but can it all be down to what we read and where we scroll? I must admit, I don’t think I can open up Instagram without seeing a ‘we are all feminists’ t-shirt being flaunted. Don’t get me wrong, I am all for empowering women, but I think we need to tread carefully. It’s ok to be a stay at home mum and still struggle. It’s ok to have a career and no children and struggle. It’s ok to not be an athlete at the gym. And it’s ok to not have your shit together. I feel this ’empowerment’ movement has overlooked the ability for women to be sensitive and vulnerable. Just because we are out there kicking arse, doesn’t mean we need to hide our insecurities. In fact, we should share them with one another so we can learn from each others’ mistakes. All the while, supporting women, doing not only amazing ventures but celebrate those women who dedicate their lives to bringing up their children and running a household – as that’s no easy feat either. We need to celebrate it all! And we need to celebrate the fact that women don’t need to ‘have it all’
What is the point in being so tired and stressed every day that you don’t actually get to sit down with your children and just enjoy their company. Just you and them. And what is the point in working long hours, so you can earn more money to spend it on things that impress people you don’t even like? It really is a relentless rat race!
I also feel like everyone has to be busy all the time. Being busy has now become the number one metric in which we measure success. Being busy to me, is very subjective. What does busy even mean? You were busy plucking your eyebrows? What I classify as busy is very different to the person next to me. And that’s ok! I’d like to see people measuring their own level of success by the amount of happiness they bring into their life and to those around them. Because being happy is work. It doesn’t just happen!
I am all for women going after their dreams, having a career, starting a business, being a stay at home mum, juggling it all…whatever floats your boat. But do it because it’s the right thing for you. You don’t have to prove yourself to any other woman, man or social group.
I certainly do not have any answers. But I do know that there are many women out there doing amazing things every day who are not celebrated. Or maybe it even lies in the fact that we actually don’t need to celebrate these things at all. Maybe we just need to live out our lives purposely without the need to tick boxes and compare. Or maybe it just comes down to showing your vulnerability a bit more, and creating a more supportive network of women. After all, being uncomfortable is where you find your biggest growth.
As this blog post had nothing to do with what I’m wearing….please find below my outfit details! As always, when I feel good in an outfit I exude confidence. And life is too short not to be confident.
K- Leather & Soie
What I’m wearing:
Vest – http://www.kookai.com.au
Polka dot mesh top – http://www.serpantandtheswan.com
Leopard print belt – http://www.jcrew.com
Leather pants – http://www.viktoriaandwoods.com.au
Boots – http://www.jomercer.com.au